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    Yesterday: Newport Beach, 72 degrees and clear to Catalina, walking on crystal white sand, the dull roar of surf, a rock jetty, standing on boulders out in the middle of the place where water greets land in waves, the hard edge of horizon an even keel. Thinking about leaving, the ocean, how even if I don't see something, it lives inside of me, that I can summon it anytime. Calm and restful, taking a mental picture to carry with me.

    And as I am thinking this, dolphins breach right out at the end of the jetty. A gasp of pure magic and delight to actually see the sea navigated. An entire pod (dolphin, from the greek, animal with a womb). This power and graceful rolling. And then they begin surfing the waves along with the humans on boards––indescribably fabulous, it felt like I was swept along with them, rushing through water. And like a child at Christmas, that sense of wonder and disbelief and joy. My head said it understands this is what dolphins do, every day, just like as a child I knew there was no Santa Claus. But still, for a moment, the difference between imagining and seeing proof, a gift in the hands. Delerium. Just to solidify it, waves crashed the jetty and soaked me. Twice, for emphasis. So this I will carry too.

    So many words to choose from... I was going to pick dive or surf, or any other of those wonderful words that noun and verb, the thing and the action. But what was left with me was understanding how the dolphins both followed their path and let go into the waves, how they existed unseen yet the total magic of reality. Both. The rising of the body out of the water, over and over again a breath of air, the undulation between not knowing if it was coming back and then the surprise when it did, each action reinforcing the last. Even if I don't see it, it is there and might appear at the damndest of times. And it will rise powerfully then let go into the swell. How you have to see it in the first place to remember it.




    1. a sudden powerful forward or upward movement, especially by a crowd or by a natural force such as the waves or tide.

    synonyms: gush, rush, outpouring, stream, flow, swell, heaving, rolling, roll, flooding, swirling; tide

    • a sudden large increase, typically a brief one that happens during an otherwise stable or quiescent period. (increase, rise, growth, upswing, upsurge, groundswell, escalation, leap)

    • a major deployment of military forces to reinforce those already in a particular area.

    • a powerful rush of an emotion or feeling.

    • a sudden marked increase in voltage or current in an electric circuit.


    1. move suddenly and powerfully forward or upward.

    synonyms: gush, rush, stream, flow, burst, pour, cascade, spill, overflow, sweep, roll swell, heave, rise, roll

    • increase suddenly and powerfully, typically during an otherwise stable or quiescent period. (rise, grow, escalate, leap)

    • (of an emotion or feeling) affect someone powerfully and suddenly.

    • (of an electric voltage or current) increase suddenly.

    • (nautical: of a rope, chain, or windlass) slip back with a jerk.


    late 15th century (in the sense ‘fountain, stream’): the noun (in early use) from Old French sourgeon ; the verb partly from the Old French stem sourge-, based on Latin surgere ‘to rise.’ Early senses of the verb included ‘rise and fall on the waves’ and ‘swell with great force.’

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