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I gush.
I shouldn't but I do then the water is out of the gate and swept. Maybe that is how I have been able to make my work, overcoming the resistance until the dam breaks and words bounce rocks and spill. A storm fed flood followed by whatever comes after.
Perhaps a slow steady release, like steam, an engine or a turbine turned, electricity generated by falling. Or rising. Maybe I can figure that out. Not be the water but the thing that puts a bridle and harness onto its back and rides it into another form. Willpower and control.
Except there is nothing so beautiful as water doing what it is supposed to do.
But I have tried being the water. So now I will go for the low hum of electricity instead. See what that brings. Even though I know nothing can hold a river when swollen. Sometimes it just needs to get carried away.
Thankfully I am a poet, know they are just words. It is only on paper that the rush happens, as if I cannot cork the ants of consonants and vowels pouring from the hill. Out loud, my tongue becomes a blank sheet more often than not. I often write things I have to say, so I know what words to pull down from my brain, arrange them appropriately, iron their dress.
It is the editing, culling down, that makes something a poem. The problem is, you don't know what the magic mix is until they are already out and swimming inappropriately with all the other effluvia. Such an overwhelming thing sometimes to live in an outpouring of words followed by silence. Too much, too little. Somehow, I know there is a middle way.
Or maybe just forgive the water for being itself.
gush
[ɡəSH/]
verb
1. flow out in a rapid and plentiful stream, often suddenly, with a rushing sound
synonyms: surge, burst, spout, spurt, jet, stream, rush, pour, spill, well out, cascade, flood; flow, run, issue
send out in a rapid and plentiful stream
to flow out or issue suddenly, copiously, or forcibly, as a fluid from confinement
to have a sudden, copious flow, as of blood or tears
2. speak or write with effusiveness, enthusiasm, and emotion.
synonyms: enthuse, rave, be enthusiastic, be effusive, rhapsodize, go into raptures, wax lyrical, praise to the skies, overpraise;
noun
1. a rapid and plentiful stream or burst of fluid
synonyms: surge, stream, spurt, jet, spout, outpouring, outflow, burst, rush,cascade, flood, torrent; efflux "a gush of water"
2. the fluid emitted.
3. effusive or enthusiastic language or behavior, sometimes sentimental or insincere.
Origin
late Middle English: probably imitative. 1350-1400 Middle English; probably phonesthemic in orig.; see 'gust', 'rush'; v.12c. gosshien "make noises in the stomach; " later (c.1400) "rush out suddenly, pour out," probably formed imitativeally in English underinfluence of Old Norse gusa "to gush, spurt," related to geyser. Metaphoricsense of "speak in an effusive manner" first recorded in 1873. The noun is 1680s, from the verb.
